I decided to practice a bit on my knitting machine, but doing anything besides the most simple of constructions is nearly impossible without having weight to hold your work down (creating the tension).
I’ll be getting some this week. I can’t wait to get started on my first sweater on this!
Tomorrow I go to my very first Hormone Replacement Therapy appointment, and hopefully I’ll get to start taking testosterone. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to, I have a lot of health issues, but then again, I know of a lot of people with my specific health issues who are on T. :crosses fingers:
There’s also the fact that I’m genderqueer. I do lean masc, but not completely. I have all these conflicting feelings, but I also remember being 19 years old and reading about transition. I remember being in high school and wanting so badly to get rid of my chest (that feeling has never, ever gone away). I watch others transition, and it hurts.
When people call me ‘sir’, I walk on air for a few days.
I can’t stay this depressed any longer. I can’t every winter and summer look into transitioning. I’m forty fucking years old, I have to stop being scared of the boogeymen that are my parents and be myself.
I just hope I don’t come home disappointed.
Last night I decided to finish my ‘round’ (really the second halves of two socks) even though it was late. I wanted to have less than ten rounds of colorwork to go.
Hubris. I was tired and didn’t count properly and missed two stitches of the Opal (the lighter color). So this morning I’m ‘tinking’ (tink is knit backward) to my mistake point to fix it. I could have done duplicate stitch afterwards, but that wouldn’t feel the same to me. But un-floating all of these floats is a very good motivator to be more careful & alert from now on!
Fiber carefully, or share my fate! 🧟♀️
Life & Fiber 